Hero of the Day: Mike Huckabee

I think I've found a new political hero, and his name is Mike Huckabee. Yes, I'll admit I was tickled when the guy used Baby Jesus' birthday and a subliminal cross hovering above his left shoulder to sell the American public on the notion that the true Spirit of Christmas can only be realized by waltzing on over to the polling booth and proclaiming him Baptist minister in Chief. And it was a welcome diversion from the endless parade of official condolences and paeans for Pakistani democracy that were heard in the wake of Benazir Bhuto's assassination when Huckabee responded to the incident by, first apologizing to the Pakistani people for her death, and then turning around and insisting that the assassination proves the need for better protection against the horde of Pakistani illegal immigrants flooding our borders every year. But his latest move surpasses even those ploys (gaffes?) in its degree of jaw-droppingly goofy shamelessness. I am speaking, of course, of the news conference that Huckabee... the Huckster (is it OK if I call him the Huckster from now on?)... at any rate, as I was saying, the news conference... ah yeah.. brilliant.

So, finding his poll numbers battered down by a barrage of negative advertisements paid for by a guy who thinks that Satan is Jesus' brother, the Huckster decides that it's time to go on the offensive. But there's one problem: our guy has promised to stay positive, and much of his appeal has to do with the fact that he's such a nice, genial fellow who'd never so much as raise his voice in anger. So how do you fight fire with fire without actually employing fire? The Huckster thinks he's found the answer: He'll show the people a vision of His wrath, without actually going through the trouble of raining fire and brimstone and locusts and sores upon the unbelievers. His hope is that those who have lost faith in his righteousness will come back into the fold once they understand just ho merciful a Huckster he really is. In other words, Huckabee will call a news conference to tell reporters that he's been contemplating the running of a devastating attack ad against Mitt Romney, but at the last minute, just couldn't bring himself to run it, because deep down inside he's such a nice guy. And oh... just so you reporters will understand how devastating the ad would have been... have a look...

Yes all politicians are shameless and craven, but by and large they have enough respect for their supporters that they don't go out in public wearing a button that says "Kiss me, I'm Craven & Shameless." Mike Huckabee, on the other hand, seems very much to be running a campaign premised on the notion that no politician ever lost a race by under-estimating the intelligence of the American voter. When a roomful of reporters breaks out in laughter at the transparent shamelessness of a politician's latest gambit, you know he harbors such contempt for his own supporters that he doesn't feel the need to work all that hard to mask it.

In the end, there's something almost endearing in a politician who's that cynical, and not afraid to let the "intellectual elites" know it. Either that or Huckabee really is a moron and has inexplicably managed to make it this far in politics. Whatever the case may be, whether it be for showing a degree of contempt for the process that would make even Karl Rove gasp, or for making it this far on Jeff Spicoli's brain, Mike Huckabee, "The Huckster," is my Hero of the day.

Romney Sorta Makes Stuff Up

Apparently Mitt Romney "saw" his dad march with Martin Luther King in much the same way I "saw" my dad abducted by aliens.




Really, it's pretty sad when Dennic Kucinich's claim to have seen a UFO is more credible than your claim to have seen your dad march with MLK.

The Face of our Fears

The term pre-9/11 mentality has been used by Republicans as a pejorative term to describe Democratic opponents who (these Republicans would have us believe) do not exhibit the requisite sense of urgency and understanding of the nature of the terrible "terrorist threat" that lingers over our nation. But reading the story of Eva Ósk Arnardóttir you get a sense that perhaps the only sane people left in this paranoid asylum we call America are the blessed few who still cling to the vestiges of that same "pre-9/11" mentality.

Eva is a blonde, Icelandic woman who recently travelled to New York to do a little Christmas shopping. But upon discovering that on one of her several vacations to the U.S. (and not the most recent one either) Eva had overstayed her Visa by three weeks, DHS officials had her detained, chained, imprisoned and deported, without so much as a call to the Icelandic embassy or the benefit of a consular visit.

This, folks, is one of the many faces of New Paranoia, propagated by alarmist demagogues such as George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, Rudy Giuliani, Fox News, Pat Roberston and the entire Neocon commentariat. It is sad to say that her case will prove compelling to many, simply because she is a pretty, young blond woman who was forced to endure 24 hours of humiliation over a rather trifling lapse that she had good reason to assume had been long ago forgiven or forgotten. Sadly, that assumption proved naïve to say the least. America is slowly transforming itself into a Security State where privacy, civil rights and even common sense give way to the vigilance of our paranoid overseers. Of course, other less lucky and less fair skinned travelers have endured far more savage treatment at the hands of our lawless proto-fascist security agencies (and those same agencies have shielded themselves from responsibility, recompense or oversight by invoking various secrecy acts.) But in a nation that sits zombielike, glued to the 24 hour machine-gun coverage of cable news outlets every time a young blond woman is abducted or murdered by a depraved husband or lover, perhaps Eva's story will make some inroads and help rouse a dozing populace from this pernicious nightmare we are dreaming.

Rudy Delivers

Q: What does Rudy want this Christmas?
A: "Peace through strength."

Tasteful, and not tacky at all.

We do not torture...

A cartoon:

Something Odd About That Picture

Fox News is not shy about supporting candidates it likes and trashing those it doesn't (though the network will never admit to its obvious bias). It's also relatively well known that higher-ups at Fox have got a thing for NY Mayor Rudolph Giuliani and are pretty much actively supporting his presidential run. So I found it rather curious to surf on over to Fox this afternoon and see the following image of Mitt Romney on the website. What stuck out, mostly, was Romney's prominent and oddly proportioned chin. Now, Romney certainly has a prominent chin, but I'd never seen him looking like this. Was Fox News digitally manipulating Romney's picture to make him look strange? I can't say for sure. I'll leave it up to you to make up your minds for yourself (click the image to make it larger):

Shocking... I know (OK, not really).

Joe Lieberman loves Socrates, but he loves war more.